Healthy Lifestyle

“In the stillness, everything happens.

In the silence, everything is said.” ― Drew Gerald

Reading

Just finished this, and it was a great mystery, breezed through it

So excited that I just began this one, it takes place in….Philadelphia!!  Later this month I plan on seeing the author (Liz Moore) speak AND guess what? I am hosting my FIRST official book club and guess what we are reading! You guessed it. Long Bright River!Image result for book club

 14 books by black woman you have to read

Thinking

Love these cool and unique date ideas and will be partaking in a few for sure!

I hate not understanding or not being good at something. Hate is a gentle word. As how I really feel is @#$&*%=-+#*2!!!!!!! My head is spinning! Trying to gain an understanding of stocks and options but there is just so much information. Will need to schedule another coffee chat with my brilliant friend soon to guide me !

Focus. Focus. Focus. I feel so overwhelmed. There are 50 plates spinning ahead of me and I don’t know which one to stop and tackle first. Ever feel that way? So many wonderful and exciting things in my present and future. How do I enjoy and give my 100% to all? Need to figure out a plan for myself ….. start small. Form a plan. One step and minute and hour at a time.

  • Fun: plan one fun thing to do each week with someone (movie. Art museum. Dinner. Coffee and talk. Game night. Puzzle night, etc)
  • Work: work on a schedule for my meetings and what I need to prepare for each. Then prepare for one meeting at a time
  • Health. Schedule the doctors appointments I need to
  • Networking. Schedule one meeting this week to talk and brainstorm

When I write it out it becomes clearer and more manageable. Small steps. The anxiety and excitement still overcome me. Yet it seems real and doable.

Would love your tips on balance ? How do you manage?

Tired. About hearing about couples. Singles. Partners. That choose to remain childless. It is quite annoying, the commentary, the judgments.  I love that our society is headed in the direction of”no norms” but we still have a long way to go. We do not tell people to NOT have children. So why do we feel the need to tell them they should??. Their lives will be happier and more fulfilled with them? Can we accept that this may just not be the case for many? Without question and judgement ? Diet culture (don’t get me started) Children. Marriage. Success. Job security. Etc etc etc. It is time now to accept that times are different. There is no “norm”. Please let’s stop feeding into it.

Myths and stories we continue to tell:

  1. Something must be wrong with his/her/them for choosing not to want to have children -false
  2. Fat is unhealthy and lazy- false
  3. Believing we are all equal – false.
  4. Everyone has the same opportunity to become successful. false
  5. Fit = healthy. False
  6. Not being married makes you a flirt, not-ready to settle. Etc. False
  7. You should like everyone False
  8. We should do and say things that make everyone happy. False
  9. Insert your own here …..you get the idea

What are some of your old beliefs that you can challenge and think about differently ?

Inspired

This time last year, I would NEVER have done as much socially as I have in the past few months. I owe this to 1) Myself, for being open 2) the right people that accept and encourage and make things enjoyable

By the brilliant people that surround me. It’s exciting and invigorating to see how others can help me work towards my goals and create new ones I never knew were possible.

 

Sharing

This morning I was drinking my coffee , gazing out the window and just ……….relaxing. Wow, if you know me, or know me by now, you know that this is something I severely struggle with. Partially I think if I ease up or relax a bit, that I am being……lazy. Not sure how this arose, and oddly enough, I don’t judge others for resting and relaxing (in fact I often encourage it) Yet for myself, I push and push, and if I don’t, I fill my head with guilty “thoughts”, so THINKING about this, I am so “hard” in all areas of my life. I feel it , the constant push, the masculine side of me, pushing away the feminine. I struggle with the softness and more gentle approach, even though I (secretly) prefer it most times.  So I am looking for ways to be softer in all areas of my life.  Including the foods I eat, the movement I do, the attention I give others, the self judgment, the strength in my musles.  find times when I do NOT feel strong, I am miserable and agitated and feel like I can’t cope. A constant reminder that this is just one aspect of me. The weakness, tiredness , lack of motivation. It will pass and balance out with strenght, energy and motivation. Without feeling the softer side, the strong side wil never be at its best .Image result for we all have a feminine and masculine

I always have journaled. I love how it makes me feel and I love leaving something behind. It’s fun to occasionally go back and read things. Sometimes I feel like a stranger within my own body ! (Did I really write that?).

Recently came across a post where the authors mother had journaled every day for her entire life. Even if it was a little something about what she ate for dinner or how the weather was. Now that her mother is no longer around she has this wonderful memory to go back to! I love this idea and concept and wish others in my family (hint hint mom!) would try this! It’s incredibly therapeutic! No matter how down I feel a little bit of journaling always makes me feel better too! ***do it for at least 5 to 10 minutes and don’t give up! I am currently using a paper journal as well as this app. This has been the best no frills app for journaling. I have tried many! Simple and to the point. Easy to navigate.Image result for journal entries from 1950

This weekend I went on a mini-retreat. Just to rest and relax out of my typical environment (Sadly, this is the only way I can relax, when I am OUT of my current environment)  It was a quick 2 hour trip to the pocono mountains, and as great and needed as it was, I was disappointed with my choice of hotel and spa.  I am not going to bad mouth on here, if interested reach out to me personally for info, but I was not a fan and will NOT be back for many reasons. Lesson learned, so no harm done!

A few POSITIVE things about my trip were :

  • won a few $$ playing roulette (go me! First-time newbie)
  • had the most fabulous drink (smoked Paloma)Smoked Paloma Cocktail Paloma Cocktail, Refreshing Drinks, Smoke, Vape, Smoking, Actingand meal (falafel) at The Frogtown Chophouse
  • Amazing veggie burger @ GUY FIERI’S MT. POCONO KITCHEN
  • did some outlet shopping
  • was actually able to relax
  • tried a new yoga class and LOVED it

 

 

Healthy Lifestyle

“That’s the part I was stuck in,

the part where you accept the apology because it’s easier than addressing the root of the problem,”

― Taylor Jenkins Reid, The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo

Reading

Image result for reading

I am coming off a total book coma. I just read two EXCELLENT books (actually THREE) and am now struggling to get into my current reads.   I guess things could be worse 😉

 

Read

A little bit of everything……(and in NO particular order)

The Wives  Really enjoyed this thriller too!!

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo  So far my favorite read of 2020! Not at all what I expected. Beautiful story, and NOT at all what I expected (Honestly I expected “fluff” But it was so, so much more!

  • “People think that intimacy is about sex. But intimacy is about truth. When you realize you can tell someone your truth, when you can show yourself to them, when you stand in front of them bare and their response is ‘you’re safe with me’- that’s intimacy.”
    ― Taylor Jenkins Reid, The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo

Mrs. Everything So good! Got my momma reading it now (Contemporary fiction)

A Madness of Sunshine – Excellent read!  Kept me so engaged the entire time!  The ending felt a bit rushed IMO , but still really LOVED this one!

Currently Reading

Defending Jacob(SO GOOD!)

Started this one

Sitting on my coffee table….

 

Thinking

I love to write, the idea of being a “writer” gives me goosebumps. Surrounding myself by inspirational people that encourage me = can’t get any better than that!  Something I am considering. This retreat ❤  Oh my….

Advancing my acro.

Struggling – so much- with being present. I could NOT sleep last night. My skin was crawling, I was tossing and turning. My mind was on overload and I felt like “I” wanted to claw myself OUT OF my own body. Image result for emotional distress art I find myself living constantly in the “What’s next” instead of being present in the Right now.  I am realizing that this exactly is the cause of my anxiety, discontent, fear.   I am not fully present anywhere. So in turn, I find myself feeling MISERABLE, annoyed, irritated, and just waiting for the “next thing”. Clearly, this tactic is NOT working for me or anyone, so I realize the right action is the OPPOSITE action, Yet it is so hard to retrain your brain after so many years of living this way.

Of course, I want a quick fix. I want things to happen overnight. (or sooner). I want to feel happy all the time.  Who wouldn’t?  Yet a constant reminder that I need to continue to tell myself is ONE STEP AT A TIME.  My goal is to look for small opportunities and begin there.

  • enjoying and tasting my cup of coffee instead of just downing it
  • breathing, feeling and listening during yoga classes, instead of thinking about what I need to do after
  • listening and really hearing my students, when they try to tell me things, more importantly HELPING them verbalize those feelings
  • allowing myself to feel comfortable, even if I have other things to do. Allow myself that glass of wine, a cup of coffee, a slice of cheesecake, even if it were not a planned part of my day
  • leaving the set plan and itinerary i set for myself daily and living more intuitively, not just with food but in ALL areas of my life

Inspired

By Intuitive Eating. If you are not familiar, I HIGHLY recommend you read this and START practicing, January is over, stop the diet talk and start actually living life for what it is, it is NOT a size or a number or how “clean” you can eat.

  • My own journey is a constant struggle and battle. I have felt a lot of shame around this issue. Yes, I had an eating disorder, yup it defined me for quite some time. Yes, I allowed others to judge me (and let it get to me) Yet, I am intuitively realizing its not about anyone else but myself. People are free to judge and think about what they want.
    • This morning, I WAS hungry, in fact, I would say “starving”, yet of course I questioned my own body and mind. “How could I justify being hungry? I just ate, I am not supposed to be hungry, etc, etc, etc,” The story goes on. Well, guess what? I turned OFF my audiobook, sat in silence and began screaming the thoughts that came into my mind. I realized I was denying myself. I was hiding my feelings and emotions, I was ignoring and dismissing myself. Feelings are just that, feelings. We (I) Need to better accept them for WHAT THEY ARE instead of constantly trying to make sense of them, or dissect them or determine answers. I spend so much time and energy being my own detective and so little time actually …..feeling, Maybe there are no answers. In fact, I KNOW there aren’t any because trying to “Figure things out” has gotten me nowhere! Time to try another approach
    • Another excellent post on diet culture

Content-ness – How do you do it? How are you so content and positive? I love it and it is so inspirational! I strive for that, instead of my serious, driven mind going all the time.  Love seeing how others can really just take it one moment, one breath at a time and just love life, no matter what is currently in it. I find myself gravitating towards these people more and more lately!

Sharing

I watched a few episodes of “Cheer” on Netflix and….not feeling it.  Although I am at a healthy place, it was quite annoying and triggering and sad seeing young people focused on weight and image.  Next! May try this suggestion(Thanks Jer!)

FINALLY ordered my buffet table for my dining area!!! I am super excited to put it together and organize it (Update! It is here , just need to assemble……..)

My weekend project (one of them) Was organization!  I ordered these velvet hangers and got rid of all my mismatched, ugly, plastic hangers that were driving me nuts

Registered for NY Acro Fest with my amazing partner and friend! Can’t Wait!!

Getting close to accomplishing a headstand! woooo

OMG, this coffee, is incredible! Thank you “M” for recommending it!!!! Now I need to gift myself a perfect (BIG) mug for my cozy weekends!any suggestions ? (No Yeti or travel thermals please, a MUG)

I am ANGRY. So so so angry with myself. Instead of accepting this anger I have been avoiding it and trying to deal with it or tell myself to quiet and hush up. Yet by not voicing my thoughts and feelings, I am hurting myself and causing pain.

So excited I have booked a mini getaway for myself. I plan on introverting, reading, yoga-ing, hiking and getting pampered

Your TURN

What are you reading? What have you read?

How do you deal with the busyness of your brain?