Healthy Lifestyle

I am a nobody, who are you?

Image result for emily dickinson I am a nobody

Thinking

Love what you do, be proud of who you are, all of your accomplishments (and flaws) NOT just in front of your kids (or others) But in front of everyone!  Awesome article here

YES! Please stop, not only teachers but anyone that is not an introvert (or as introverted) Please stop telling others to change!  Great read

A recent re-injury has me thinking, AM I REALLY LISTENING to my body? Nope. I am not. This has been my biggest struggle. Some days I feel like a Robot. I don’t know HOW to listen to my body. Definitely a practice I will continue to work on understanding. HOW TO START LISTENING TO YOUR BODY (Link)

Tips to be a better conversationalist. Yes! I can’t stand the minute details. Like dates. Or names or things that do not matter to the conversation. Just spit it out! My patience and tolerance are low. Here are some great suggestions (link here)Image result for please just stop talking

Is a yoga mat considered carry on luggage?

Reading

Nothing better than a few great reads in a row! Hoping to keep the streak going and not end up with a book hangover!Image result for book hangover

Watching

Some amazing 8th graders graduate last night!! So beyond proud of them.  What an inspirational class that amazes me in so many ways. CONGRATS Class of 2023!

Dream Life

Love this neutral on neutral inspired Living Room SO Much!

Inspired By

The above picture, to work on my home during the summer ❤

A conversation with a friend about HUGS!  Curious, do you hug, hug and kiss, get touchy with friends?  I admit I would like to be more so, but am not really able to at the moment. I crave it, yet fear it.  Read more Image result for types of hugs

Forming HEALTHY relationships, staying away from toxic ones.  Great tips and info here if you think you may be in one

Finding your ikigai. FASCINATING!

 

Sharing

I love and always will the Trader Joes Coconut Body Butter lotion. This summer I am truly LOVING the Cucumber Avocado Body Butter, so hydrating, smells amazing and feels so cool and refreshing on!

Trader Joe’s Cucumber Avocado Body Butter Limited Edition 8 Oz W/ Shea

I am scared. So scared.  Scared to be ….me.   Lately, I have been doing things out of my comfort zone. It has been terrifying, beautifully, scary.  I love to travel. Solo. This is the first time in quite some time, I am letting go of the control of planning every last thing, finding a quiet room or Airbnb ALL myself, and instead, putting my trust into others. I am going to Poland and Prague for 12 days, yes.  I am scared and excited to see my family, some that I have never met, some that I have met years ago, some that we already have a special connection although we are far apart. Most of all, I am scared of losing myself, I am scared of hushing me inside and telling her to change, to be different, to please others. I am scared of losing that voice.  I am scared if I am me, no-one will like me or love me.  I am scared, but I am more scared of living a life that is unfulfilling to myself. I owe that to myself, we all do.  I feel different. I feel special. I feel weird. I feel loving. I feel all sorts of things as well, and I am pretty sure I am not the only one 🙂

 

Healthy Lifestyle

Love myself I do

Dream Life

Love myself I do. Not everything, but I love the good as well as the bad. I love my crazy lifestyle, and I love my hard discipline. I love my freedom of speech and the way my eyes get dark when I’m tired. I love that I have learned to trust people with my heart, even if it will get broken. I am proud of everything that I am and will become. ~Johnny Weir

Image result for free from myself

Reading

Miracle Creek 

An Anonymous Girl (I am 90% done, getting so close to figuring things out! Keeping me on my toes!)

American Spy

Watching

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The freakin’ lawn grows like a weed! I have been mowing 2-3 per week!  Each time I finish mowing, I SWEAR the grass has grown since I started.  It does not help that my obsessive-compulsive personality makes it difficult to sit back and relax while I KNOW the lawn needs another mowing.  Sheesh!

The good news? The lawn is still green (well green-ish)!

Inspired By

Since it is Fathers Day, this will be fitting. I am inspired by my father and his “Do as I want” lifestyle.  My dad is known to mysteriously disappear from dinner, a wedding, church, a party, ANYTHING, to go do what he wants. He does not even think twice about it, and most importantly he is doing what he wants without even a worry that he may be upsetting or hurting someone else.  He KNOWS this is not his intent, therefore he does not even think twice.  He does as he pleases.

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He is such a big kid at heart…..

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and “cleans up” fairly well 🙂

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JUST Don’t mess with EITHER one of us when we are hungry……..NOT GOOD

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Thank you for making me love the outdoors and nature (although I lack the green thumb)

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Thank you dad for giving me those legs and calves!  

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Always providing me and giving me whatever I needed or wanted, like the top bunk!

I want to be like my father. I want to do what I want. I want to listen to my heart, my gut, my intuition.  I want to do things without worrying that I am offending or upsetting someone else. I want to get better at being responsible for my own actions, and not feeling responsible for the way someone ELSE percieves my choices.
Thank you, dad, for teaching me SO much.

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You have given me your strength

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Your “Work hard, rest later” attitude

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Most of all your love and dedication to us…..

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I am missing our annual Fathers Day Fishing Trip today (which originated as a child when we would set off before the sun rose, grab a dozen donuts #bostonCremeForLife, and be on our merry way) Image result for boston cream donutsbut my dad is experiencing a well-deserved trip that he has put many years of labor, hard work and dedication towards. I love you, dad, I hope you are having the time of your life!  Can’t wait to join you on our next adventure! 

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Grateful For

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The rain.  It saves me about 30 minutes of watering!

Thinking

Where I’m Not Fulfilled: One of my favorite podcasters (OLD podcast) attended a show author, Chalene Johnson’s, book launch party, in which she had everyone complete a task!

On a scale of 0-10 (10 being completely satisfied and 0 being not at all, and 7 not being allowed), rate where you’re feeling for the following categories:

physical health
mental well-being
environment & surroundings
hobbies & restorative activities
romantic
friends & family
financial
significance
spirituality
personal growth

This is a great way to show which areas you may need to pay a little more attention to!

Sharing

I can’t believe it, BUT I am going to Poland and Prague for 12 days in August! I am beyond excited as I just book my flight tickets today! This will be the first time since I was a baby that my mom, dad and I will be in Poland together at the same time!! I am so much looking forward to this adventure filled with family, hiking, exploration and discovering new things!

The Tatra mountains in Poland

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Prague, Czech Republic

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Healthy Lifestyle

The Idea of You

Dreaming

Thinking

Image result for ideas vs reality

 Why can’t I settle for something else for one night that is out of my typical “routine”. Stop me from overthinking and just enjoy!   It prevents me from wanting to do anything at all. I would rather stay in my zone, my comfort, instead of trying something new. I already set myself up for failure I tell myself I will not be happy or satisfied. But then If I don’t do it I am not happy nor satisfied either. I am ridden with guilt.

 I am TIRED of letting these feelings ruin my day. They appear first thing in the morning, or the night before and I cant LET go. I am SO great at letting go of things in other areas of my life, yet this is one thing, I still hold on to.

Image result for tooth hanging on by a thread      Like a loose tooth when I was a child. Remember it just barely hanging in there? A little string. Yet I feel overcome with fear about pulling it. What if it hurts too much? I think this is where I am at now.  What if things hurt too much. Or what if they feel TOO GOOD (gasp!!)  Then what? I am torn. I want to follow my intuition. Do what I want, but I also want to make sure I am not avoiding new opportunities out of fear. This is the constant battle in my head.   Yet I feel like when I “try” new things, I find myself being happier that I at least tried it and got it over with. Failing to enjoy or see the pleasure in it. Just another thing to check off my TODO list.  I would have RATHER done my initial, “Selfish” plan. If given a choice to go out with others, or go out by myself. I will always choose myself. This feels so wrong. This is the ugly shadow that I can’t yet accept.  

I am terrified of pain and not feeling MY BEST.  Temporary is ok. Long lasting is NOT.  Feeling sad for a few minutes, that’s ok.  Feeling pain for a few minutes, that is ok.  All day, hours? No.  In the past, I have dealt with A LOT of pain and it has been my mission to avoid that now.  I want to feel good, my best, ALL the time. This prevents me from taking risks. Some ways it is healthy. I am SCARED to drink a glass of wine, even though I may want it, for FEAR of not feeling well the next morning.  If I don’t feel well, I will NOT be able to do the things I enjoy and want and have planned for. My yoga practice will suffer. I will be groggy, tired, cranky. My head will hurt, eyes feel sensitive. Yes. I feel this way after having a half a glass of wine, at times. Then I question. Do I even really want the wine? I don’t even know.  I am fine without it. I enjoy the IDEA of it and what comes along with it. “If I have a glass of wine, I will feel relaxed, more open, calm” but why can’t I have and feel those things without it? I don’t know what the answer is. I try to listen to myself, and usually, the IDEA of having a glass of wine sounds great, but my reality is, I don’t really want it.  Sure it’s good, but I enjoy a cup of coffee (as long as it is from Wawa) just as much. In the bigger picture, when I look back at the times I chose not to have a glass of wine when the idea popped into my head. I am happy. I was able to spend the entire following day doing what I want, feeling MUCH better than I would if I had that glass of wine. I think the lesson here, for me, is to not get caught up in the “Idea” of things and really listen to myself.  

We have many “ideas” and ideals about the way things should be, should go, should ……..should ……..should. Yet this idea prevents us from living our true genuine life.  Whether it is the idea that in order to be seen, we need expensive dresses or cars. We need to wear makeup and look put together at all times. The idea that we need to be social butterflies. The ideas that we need to exercise and push ourselves daily. The idea that we need to eat certain foods. The idea that we need to be perfect instagramable parents.  Those are ideas. Not what is in our hearts. 

The next time you find yourself WANTING something, sit back a moment and think about it  Do you really want this? Or is it the IDEA you want.

Reading

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Miracle Creek – Still trekking through this one!! It IS getting better!

City of Girls – About 75% through and I am really enjoying this!! Some hilarious moments!  I don’t know how writers come up with these things!

My Oxford Year – I was pleasantly surprised by this book!! I really enjoyed it. It was beautiful!  (4/5 stars)

Looking for a good summer read?  Here are a few of my recommendations that I think are PERFECT summer reads!

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Summer Sisters by Judy Blume – This is one of my all time favorites!

Daisy Jones and the Six – Summer vibes!

Verity – you will finish this in one beach day

The Forever Summer

Still House Lake (#1) Suspenseful

Firefly Lane 

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Love to read? Hate to read? READ this, please ❤    So many benefits!

Watching

  •  I want to go to NYC just to see these punching bags and see people punching them (maybe punch them myself!? Read more HERE
  • My own accomplishment, moving, watering and keeping a lawn and flowers ALIVE!

Inspired by

Grateful

  • The smiles I have seen in recent photos of my parents latest journey and adventure. Each time I speak/video chat with my mom or dad, they are radiant!
  • Being so busy that I do not even have time to miss my parents
  • I may have the opportunity to travel again this summer
  • My voice. Being able to speak up, still a challenge BUT a work in progress
  • My cousin from Poland and I are both teachers. We have been Pen Pal’ing with our students all year. It has been such an incredible experience. We have learned SO Much.  This week we received a box filled with Polish candy along with our letters!  img_0651

Sharing

  • Bucket list item right here
  • Luna oil I use this at night and love it SO MUCH. Some dislike the smell, I actually love it!
  • Obsessed with my new glasses from Warby Parker! img_0612
Healthy Lifestyle

“Friends ask you questions;

enemies question you.” ~Criss Jami, Healology

Dreaming

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About going here 

Love

Lacey Dress (In “Marie”) FYI It is NOT lacey 🙂

Going to NYC soon ?? (especially solo)? Check this out

Thinking

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Sometimes I feel I don’t need or want connection but that is NOT right at all. I do crave connection. But the RIGHT connection(s). What I don’t want is all the things that go along with it that make me feel uncomfortable. What  I don’t want is others to rely on me or count on me or expect me to do and be their EVERYTHING. I don’t want people to be angry with me for turning down their offers. Yet I also don’t want them to STOP asking me because what if I do want to or feel like doing something. Selfish? Yes. Yet, I am the type of person/friend that if you need me or something or need to talk. I would/will be there. I just can’t connect physically every day. It’s too much for me. I like my routine and schedule and my freedom to float from place to place. I like to be a butterfly. Free.  I like to read and unwind and sleep early. I love to get up early and get the most important things done and out of my way.

This is my shadow self. Image result for my shadow self

The deep, ugly part of myself that I truly hate. This is my biggest struggle to overcome because I still feel WRONG. Articles I read, people I speak to, think I am wrong or weird for feeling this way. I constantly question myself. It’s not that I don’t want connection. I do actually want that. I guess what I really want is comfort. Being okay telling people EXACTLY how I feel. No, I don’t want you to see me or step into my “routines”. No, I don’t want you to judge me, no I don’t want you to give up on me and walk away, I want you to accept me as I am because I am not quite there yet. I am still struggling with the belief I am wrong. Maybe once I achieve this freedom of truly not caring. I will be able to form better connections with others, knowing that if I need/want to leave, cancel, etc, that I will still be loved and not discarded.

As always, my intentions are NEVER to hurt anyone. This NEVER has to do with anyone but me. I am empathic I CAN understand why another person would choose to walk away from me. Quite honestly, I am not certain I would be able to give someone like “me” my friendship either. I get it, truly do. There are certain things I am great at. I will get things done. If you ask, I will do the best I can. Yet I can’t be the many things others want or need me to be for them.
am so fortunate for the people that accept me. I am so grateful for this!  The person I feel most comfortable is my mother. She accepts me as I am. Yes, she voices her thoughts sometimes out of frustration, but she is still there for me, not giving up. Some times I will stop by her house and stay for 5-10 min. She says “Ok love you BYE, thanks for stopping” Other times I end up staying for hours, she reacts just the same. Yes, I see the happiness in her that I was able to stay longer and be at ease. This is easy for me with her because she does not have expectations of me. This feels so good and so freeing and I want all of my connections to be this fluid.   I hate feeling that my freedom is being taken from me, it triggers many things for me.  I can’t and won’t ever feel “stuck” again.

This has probably been the most difficult post/piece I have ever written. I think I have just realized my fear. It is being left behind if I am not the way someone else wants or needs me to be. xoxo 

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There are two types of people:  1. Those that arrive at the airport super early  2. Those that are running through the airport hoping to not miss their flight.  Super Interesting! Which one are you? I’ll be at the airport 3 hrs early. Thank you very much. 🤓

Grateful

Lucy and Lily 🙂

Great tool for helping you decide if it is a NEED or a WANT (read here)

My friend in France shared this amazing video about BREATHING and SO much more!  Take a few minutes to watch it and…………breathe.

Inspired

The Perfect relationship 🙂

Loneliness, Volunteering, and connection? How do they all connect? What a wonderful read.  Yes. I think this is my “calling”. I think I am designed to volunteer and help others ]

I need to READ this daily  I think of authentic communication as sharing the unfiltered essence of ourselves with others, including our identities, feelings, needs, boundaries, and desires.

Love these 11 ways to live by

Watching

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People at the pool, without judgment 🙂

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Planet Earth, so calming 🙂

Reading

Image may contain: one or more people

Miracle Creek –  My husband asked me to lie. Not a big lie. He probably didn’t even consider it a lie, and neither did I, at first . . .It is getting good!

My Oxford Year – This also finally grasped me!  I did not expect a sad turn , hoping for a happier ending

Can’t Hurt Me:  Master Your Mind – INFURIATING!

Sharing

Deviled Crab Dip – You’re welcome 🙂

Cleaning out your closets? Read this article about donating 🙂

My new sneaks (from Everlane) have arrived!  Last week after some research, I ordered these sneakers from Everlane for their sustainability and eco-friendliness!  My initial thoughts are mixed.  I love the quality. You can tell they are excellent quality. My first thoughts were that they would last a long time.  About the shoe? They are very hard. Not flexible at all like typical sneakers. A bit difficult to put on. I wonder if they will soften with wear (I assume yes). I ordered a FULL size up, hesitantly, but am happy I did as they fit PERFECT (Definitely size up). I ordered the Navy Blue (size 9) in hopes I could wear these outdoors for my walks and they could handle the mud and dirt.  I truly loved the light blue, “Glacier” color but opted for the Navy.  I wonder if these will actually be comfortable to walk in (once they soften a bit) They do not have much support and are so stiff. I worry my feet will hurt.  I love the way they are made and how supportive they feel, but I worry if they will be suitable for what I need. Also, the color…I don’t know, feels like it makes the shoes a bit “orthopedic” looking.  Attaching a few photos would LOVE your thoughts 🙂

Everlane Tread trainer in Navy (Size 9)

Healthy Lifestyle

I Don’t Shine If You Don’t Shine

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Dream Life

  • How adorable is this sweater!  perfect for my Maine trip (If I go) and cool nights at the beach! 
  • I could/should have worn this to my Aunt’s lovely “Going Away” Party for my parents 🙂  img_0555
  • Pretty

Grateful

Fortunately, I have never been a big drinker. In fact, I very rarely drink now. I just don’t like the way it makes me feel. I love my mornings and feeling my best.  I am so grateful that I do not struggle, yet I do struggle with other enslavements. Here is an excerpt that I think ANYONE can relate to.  If alcohol is not an issue, insert with what is, still relevant!  (full article here, Why I Gave Up Drinking)

Ultimately, the best connections happen when two people feel comfortable not only with each other, but also with themselves. It took time for me to re-learn who I really was without alcohol, but time was something I now had in abundance. When you’re drinking, hours seem to pass by in the blink of an eye. One minute you’re sitting down to a late dinner, the next you’re tumbling out of a cab at 2 a.m. When I stopped drinking, I started experiencing every minute of my day, and I gained space for more meaningful activities.

  • Practicing Not allowing criticism to affect me  This one is my favorite “Don’t waste your energy trying to change opinions…Do your thing, and don’t care if they like it.” — Tina Fey

Thinking

  • I avoid many “trackers”.  They seem purposeless to me and don’t enjoy discussing stats.  I do use a sleep app, that tracks my sleep patterns, which I will remove now.  I got what I needed from it, its consistent and I have determined what I need to do in order to get a great nights rest. So while I DO think trackers can be helpful, I also think they are a MAJOR distraction.  Preventing us from actually DOING.  It is easier to turn to an app, track our food, fitness, sleep, bowels, periods, whatever, than to actually do something about our discomfort and unhappiness (SPOILER, our unhappiness usually not about our diet, fitness, etc, its larger scale things)

Despite the initial enthusiasm for fitness tracking, she reports, the first large-scale experimental study to compare fitness trackers with non-trackers found no differences in health outcomes between the two. Later she cites a study in which trackers’ behavior initially changed before reverting back to normal: “The novelty does wear off,” she writes, “and then we return to our baseline behavior.”   Read the entire article here

  1. You are going on a trip, and you’re feeling a bit nervous about it, so you do research and buy a bunch of stuff to take with you to help you feel more secure, prepared, certain.
  2. You’re going to attend a conference, and it brings up some anxiety, so you get some gear to help you feel more prepared.
  3. You get into a new hobby, and don’t know what you’re doing so feel a lot of uncertainty, and do a ton of research for days, buying everything you can possibly think of to be fully prepared.
  4. You are hosting a social gathering and this is giving you some stress, so you buy a bunch of things to make sure the party goes as well as you can hope for.
  5. You are feeling a lot of disruption and uncertainty in your life, and find yourself procrastinating on things while doing a lot of online shopping.
  6. You are feeling uncertainty about yourself, about your looks. To help with that, you buy a lot of nice clothes and gear to make you feel better about yourself

 

This really does come down to stubbornness, can we take a moment to stop, slow down and think about the situation differently? I love the author’s tip, try to picture that person that is frustrating you as a child. You would not feel the same frustration (or maybe you would?) I do genuinely think people don’t purposely try to harm or hurt or frustrate others, sometimes It really is just us, our perception our impulsivity, trying myself to practice a little more patience. Wish me luck!

  • What happens when we compromise our CORE VALUES?   Something that is important to me is being honest with myself and others. I am receiving SO MUCH resistance with this and it is taking its toll.  Sometimes being honest is not what I or someone else wants to hear, but it is……….honest. I apologize if you don’t like it. My intentions are never to hurt you, but I can’t continue to force myself to do and say things that don’t feel “right” for me.  This makes me want to crawl out of my skin and SCREAM off the top of my lungs at times. Image result for want to scream  Then am questioned why am I being so sensitive or cranky? Because I am tired of stating and saying the same honest things over and over and over again, without being actually heard. Honestly, I have a voice and sometimes others don’t want to hear it. I am constantly questioned or persuaded to change my mind. It pushes me further away from others and does not feel good in my body or my mind. It is difficult to be honest.  I am not heartless and understand that most actions by others come from a place of love, but really I feel like there is so much judgment all around. For being different than others (Not sure I really am all that different, just more honest)  Why do others feel the need to FIX people instead of focusing on themselves? It is easier to not focus on yourself. It is difficult to say to yourself that you are wrong. It is difficult to drop the beliefs that are so ingrained in us from childhood. Yet, we are all different, no one should be judged and nagged for their decisions or actions. We can’t control others, we can only control ourselves and our reactions.  I am guilty of this as well! I am far from perfecting this skill, yet I am aware and present when and why I judge.

Reading

The Girl He Used to Know I enjoyed this book immensely! The twist at the end was shocking. A lovely story about Annaka, who is wavering on the “spectrum”. Made me gain such an appreciation for my brother. My students and even myself. Life is hard. It is a struggle for all of us

Daisy Jones and The Six (Currently listening on audio) Woah, I did NOT expect to enjoy this so much!  The audio version is incredible! It uses different voices for different characters!! What an amazing vibe and feels like you are right there with them!!!

My Oxford Year – have not decided yet how I feel about this one, so far so good!

 

Watching

Relationships.  RESPECT >  LOVE. Yes!!!  Do you agree?  read the article and let me know!

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Inspired

The loneliness of a quantified life. 

Sharing

  • I ordered my first pair of sustainable sneaks!! I can’t wait to try them out and will share my thoughts!
  • Dead plants.  My beautiful plants are not doing so well. This wet weather has drowned them, they look sorry, I think a few have crossed over to the “other side” Also my flower pot is NOT draining water, so its a big messy swimming pool for my flowers 😦 My indoor plant is doing well, but the outside ones, not so much.Image result for dead plants
  • This Buddha Bowl looks amazing!
  • I don’t shine if You don’t shine. SHine THeory
  • How to find a counselor, therapist or coach.Image result for finding therapist
  • I am currently obsessed with Lemons. My aunt made a beautiful Lemon Cake yesterday! img_0558
  • Somedays
  • Yikes.  Oddly, I have always been drawn to creepy dolls, not sure what the appeal is/was, BUT I don’t think I’ll be purchasing any …..
Healthy Lifestyle

Watering down things, but NEVER myself

Dream Life

  • Obsessed with:  Skirts with buttons (click here and here)
  • Falafel. Yum. I am craving the falafel I had in …….Paris 😦

Image result for falafel  I am hoping to get myself over to Naf Naf Grill ASAP. I still have not been there!  I made my own lemon tahini dressing today, but quite honestly it was a bit disappointing

 

Thinking

Ever wonder what it would be like to glimpse inside the lives of new couples, prisoners, pen pals through letters, texts, messages, Facebook posts, etc. Check this fascinating read out from The California Sun Magazine(Here)

How beautiful my dad’s lawn is and HOW I am going to have to try to keep up with THIS for 3 months…..img_0245

hmmmm, let’s see how long it takes for it to look like this….Image result for dead lawnImage result for did i do that meme?

Feeling lost? Here are 3 things you can do that will help (Link here)

1. Stop Big-Picture Planning – this is a skill. This is difficult and challenging. We always are thinking about what is next. I know that I am. ALL THE TIME. I don’t want to live my life like this anymore, because you miss out on so many beautiful experiences and opportunities in the NOW. Challenging? SURE,  but with a lot of self-talk, I have been able to get glimpses of this, whether on my yoga mat, in my classroom, with family, friends, at Wawa, I am trying to just be and notice and appreciate all around.
2. Asking your “people” deep questions about yourself. Find people you can trust. Shine the spotlight on yourself. ASK questions, sure it is a reassurance, BUT if the people you are asking are honest, these are all true things that will give you the boost you may need to continue working towards them
3. One tiny step. Just start. Somewhere. Anywhere. You will fail, it will hurt, it will not be enjoyable BUT this is how we learn. Being stuck in the same thing, same routine, day in and day out does NOT produce growth. This is difficult to hear. I know I DON’T want to hear this because I LOVE my rules and schedules and routines. It is so uncomfortable, PAINFUL at times to step out of that comfort zone.

I am still eyeing and contemplating purchasing Rothy’s (flats)Here are 13 of the Very Best Flats 

Inspired By

How to Self-Evaluate the 4 Parts of your Life that Matter – great read (here)  It can be troublesome to identify and admit to things that NEED changing, but the bigger challenge is actually finding WAYS to change them, instead of venting about them.  A quick rundown of the 4 areas?

  1. Psychological
  2. Physical
  3. Interpersonal
  4. Occupational

Take a compliment – why do we do this ? When anyone tells me something positive, I, in a hurried rhythm, quickly turn it into a negative.  How many times has someone complimented me on a recipe, for me to turn around and minimize it  “Oh I just followed a recipe, no big deal”.  Complemented me on a new success or achievement at work “Oh anyone would have done it if they were in my place”. My appearance. “Oh god, this old raggedy thing?”. You know the deal.  I notice women do it a lot more than men. Read here to help stop this self-sabotaging act

Buying TOO much stuff is inspired by uncertainty.  Yes! So true.  Humans avoid wanting to feel hurt, pain, love, etc. So what do we do? We gravitate towards distractions to “fix” us or make us feel better. Read this if shopping and purchasing things bring you joy. Can you find other things and ways to experience that same “high”?

 

Grateful For

Another beautiful weekend spent with my parents (They are leaving in about 2 weeks, so excited for them but I am so sad for me, going to miss them!)

Reading

The Girl He Used to Know – I loved this story so much. It was beautifully written and gave incredible insight into a woman with speculations of being on the autism spectrum. This made me tear up several times, mostly for the memories I had of my brother ❤  I loved the twist that I was not expecting. Great quick read! 4/5 stars

Healing Wounded Emotions

Quick 15 minute blinks on Blinkist. I am getting my non-fiction/self help/relationship, etc fix here with my free trial!

In a book rut. My library holds are not ready and I am audio-book’less. I am considering The Female Persuasion next.

Why I will NEVER water myself down for a date again

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Yes. 1,000 times. Never watering myself down for anyone. I am happy I am finally figuring this out now. I want to stop hiding and keep shining bright. No shame. Guilt. Or worrying about my successes making someone else feel less. Those are never my intentions. If someone else internalizes it that way. It is on them. A serial pattern in my relationships. Friendships have been easy because the expectations of “more” were not present. Once it turned romantic things changed. It does not have to.

It’s not me.

It’s not them.

It’s just not RIGHT. I’m ok with that, not watering myself down or changing who I am.

 

Watching

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My inbox and feeling irritated

My inbox is filled with people trying to get me to join something or buy something. I understand people need to make a living BUT I feel less and less peoples good intentions and authenticity. I feel this way specifically towards gyms and fitness related things. STOP forcing this on us. YOu are creating a much larger problem!

Sharing

Book Journal.  I bought myself a flexible binder. Printed out these book journaling pages (weeeeee!) and plan to set this up and play with it! I love a good old pen and paper approach!

The Ordinary skincare update. Sadly, I want to love this stuff because of reviews and the price (very reasonable) But honestly, I am not seeing/feeling much of a difference. The Marula Oil is beautiful but too heavy for me. The toner? I am not really sure WHAT it is supposed to be doing?  I do like how the retinol makes my face tingle and tighten, that would probably be my one repurchase.  Sigh….such high hopes and expectations. It did not work for me , but YOU are a different person and it may! Would love to hear your The Ordinary loves! Click here for link

Healthy Lifestyle

Triggers, not always a bad thing

Reading

  • Have not read this yet, but I think we should ALL read this Especially if you are working, parenting, wife-ing, friending, breathing…
  • The Bride Test – really enjoying this! About 75% complete and I am hooked!
  • Loving this book rec from a friend as well!
  • Confess by Colleen Hoover. Yup, she did it again. Loved it, although I found it a bit triggering, although mental and physical abuse were not a huge part of this book, something struck me about it

Thinking

Image result for triggers are not always so bad

Very triggering but very enlightening. I read a book, Confess by Colleen Hoover, and it surprisingly was very triggering for me. Brought up many emotions I have been keeping inside. Today as I have been reflecting on my week and my anger, hurt, bitterness, pain, I can see why. The book is lovely and a beautiful story, but it includes abuse. Emotional and physical. Now, I take FULL responsibility for all of my relationships, and in no way have I dealt with what many others have, but it made me a bit sad that I allowed so much multiple times, over and over. I am SO Grateful today that I have learned lessons through all of those experiences to make me see things much clearer and make smart choices for myself moving forward. SO I am not sad, upset, resentful or upset, just RAW. The memories are painful. They are shameful and yet eye-opening.
We are constantly told to “THink positive!” “Look at the BRIGHT side of things”, “Make the best of what you have” “IF life hands you lemons….you know the rest of this”. SCREW THAT. I want to feel and see and remember ALL Those painful things because that is what made me grow and made me move forward. I LOVE this little activity I came across. If you are currently or in the past struggling with a relationship that you have ended or given space to, Make a list of all the REASONS that you made that choice! Write it, list it, hang it up! Look at it each time you feel yourself wavering and wanting to give someone another chance (Not that there is anything wrong with that) But if someone is stuck and unwilling to work on themselves too, you need to move on. You made a choice intuitively, stay with that. Trust yourself. YOU are not wrong. Your feelings are your feelings. Don’t sway. Most often our intuition steers us right. How many times have you gone back to things hoping things would be better and different this time. How many times did that last? I do believe everyone deserves a second (or third or fourth) chance, but sometimes we just know…#strong

  • Well damn, I think I could have written this…..INFJs are a unique breed. Making up only 1-2 percent of the population, this rare Myers-Briggs personality type is a paradox of traits. Called “the counselor” or “the advocate,” INFJs are fascinated by people and love serving them. However, their introverted nature clashes at times with their desire to sustain meaningful relationships.   Here are the main points the article goes into depth, which I honestly felt like I wrote myself
    • 1. Sometimes I self-sabotage my chances at friendship.

    • 2. Most Friday nights, I’d love to be left completely alone.

    • 3. I can totally destroy a hobby – yup, I am the MASTER of this

    • 4. I let people off too easily.  – Not so much anymore

Grateful For

Dreaming About

Milos, Greece. WHATTTTTTTT!

Stunning

Visiting Tennessee is on my bucket list. Here is an awesome place and exhibit to visit if I or YOU go anytime soon 🙂

The best weekend road trips to take this summer. Some great ideas!

What a beautiful, feminine and classy dress! Classy girls wear pearls wears it sooo soo well. If it’s in your budget go for it sadly it is not in mine

Inspired By

  • Really want to and SHOULD read this book, The Attention MerchantsLots of people make New Year’s resolutions that focus on conserving something. Some people pledge to eat less junk food. Others will commit to saving more money.

    Columbia University law professor Tim Wu has a suggestion for something else people should consider conserving: attention. In his new book The Attention Merchants, Tim argues that our mental space is constantly being hijacked.

    “You go to your computer and you have the idea you’re going to write just one email. You sit down and suddenly an hour goes by. Maybe two hours. And you don’t know what happened,” Tim says.

    “This sort of surrender of control over our lives speaks deeply to the challenge of freedom and what it means to be autonomous.”

    Companies ranging from Google to Fox News have found ways to grab our attention, package it, and then make money off it by selling it to advertisers. On this week’s Hidden Brain, we discuss the strategies newspapers, television shows, and websites use to harvest our attention.

  • The EIGHT types of friends!  Which one are you??? Read more here
  • Timeless decor.  Yes, please!
  • Mental burnout is real. As an introvert and empath, this hits me HARD. I think my current struggle is #2 – Indecision. I make a decision then question it. I go back and forth weighing the pro’s and cons, all my options, and it is just plain exhausting. Read more here
  • More on ethical clothing. The more and more I read, the less I want to purchase anything ever again from Target, walmart, amazon, etc. We consume so much. It is ridiculous. It is so unhealthy and a search for happiness. But the only thing it is, is irresponsible Read this
  • I THINK I FOUND MY FIRST “ARTICLES CLUB” read  So many great points. Wow.
    “Men drain the emotional life out of women,”  Read it and let me know if you would be interested in an Articles Club discussion!  Date:  TBD!

Watching 

  • Into the Woods performed by DIS. What a lovely show! So much talent from such youth!! (Were they really 3rd and 4th graders!) Wow, so much potential! ❤  So much fun and so much personality. I was a bit partial to an amazing little wolf in the show…<3Image result for into the woods play

Sharing

A few of my favorites:

Trader Joes:  Cocoa Butter Lotion (Thank you to my cousin for introducing this to me!), fresh flower bunches, $1 cards for all occasions, peony candle, greek yogurt, horseradish hummus

Wegmans:  Salad Cheese Blend Mix, best prices on yogurt cups

Wawa:  Decaf and French Vanilla Coffee, the Wawa app (I have received numerous rewards (free coffee!)

Congratulations to my friend “A”. He is one of the kindest, caring, determined and dedicated people I know. This week he SUCCESSFULLY took his Final Exam in math and Kicked Butt!

Target:  This seaweed scrub is amazing I love how it smells and makes me feel squeaky clean, Acure Brightening Facial Scrub is amazing

Healthy Lifestyle

Valuable Values

Thinking

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The struggle of being an introvert AND highly sensitive. Being highly sensitive means that you can’t handle loud noises, places, crowds, lights, sounds, etc. Anything that your senses can see/hear/taste and feel.  I struggle with loud places, smells, tastes, lighting. It physically hurts at times.  Its easier for me if I can be an observer in these situations, not interact just observe, but it can still be difficult (I very much dislike thing like crowded yoga classes, sitting too close or speaking too close to me, very bright places, very loud places (like concerts))  I also absorb what those closest to me are feeling. When it is something like anxiety or anger, it is painful for me too.  I wish there was a magic wand or pill I could take to make this easier, but there is not. My only choice is to make it work for me. So, I can plan short increments ( I love knowing there is going to be an end to something), choose “off” times or smaller venues, and just be clear and not force myself to stay in situations I can’t handle. Along with this comes guilt, something I also am working on. Here is a great article that goes in depth about all of these things.  Sometimes I would much rather do something FOR you than actually spend time with you.

So I can see how a lot of these are helpful and necessary but also have some disagreements with a few.  For example:  Working in a job you don’t love.  Luckily I am fortunate in this area because I do love my job, BUT others that may not, also may not have a choice at that moment in their life.  I think the focus should be more on finding joy in the little things and changing your mind frame versus quitting and doing something you “love”.  You can “love” things in various ways

#1 is my biggest struggle. Would love to hear YOUR thoughts!

  • Living Alone, You May Be More Likely to Struggle with Mental Health  I can see this view, however again,  I think it can be done in a healthy way
  • How to deal with Toxic Families:  I think this is great to consider for ALL relationships, not just families! I think it is important to add, how to encourage and practice empathy. You can still set boundaries without judgment for someone that does not fit into your lifestyle.  It is not to say the person is bad, evil or wrong, it only confirms it is not right for YOU at the moment.
  • About my Mothers Day/Fathers Day brunch menu. Since my parents will be leaving soon for their 3-month long trip/adventure, I will be having a little Mothers Day/Fathers day brunch to send them off 🙂

 

Dream Life

This is so pretty 

Larger View of Product

So peaceful

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Reading

Not a book, BUT an interesting article about how rich men, are full of it!  Do you agree? Disagree!?  Would love to hear thoughts and comments!

* I am interested in hosting an “articles party”. I would love to meet at a coffee shop or cafe to discuss an article.  This takes the pressure off having to read an entire book and would lead to some great discussion! let me know if you are interested in participating!

Currently Reading

The Silent Patient:  So good!! I was hoping to get through this quickly and need to be better about my physical book reading because this is just WAY too good! Also, I feel terrible, a friend wanted to borrow this for a trip this weekend BUT I failed to complete it 😦

Confess by Colleen Hoover:  Just started this. I love, love love this author!

Completed

Ghosted:  No, this is not about ghosts 🙂  It is about dating and being “ghosted” (new term now) When someone is really “into” you, seems to like you, then “Disappears”. This seems to be a huge trend today, especially with online dating……Ok, So I side-eyedImage result for side eyeing meme this at first and about halfway through was thinking of placing this on my DNF (Did not finish) List. I am so happy that I continued! This turned out to be a great read!  If you read it, hang in there the first half is a bit slow (I have issues with patience 🙂 )  Lots of twists and turns.

Inspired

Spring cleaning and decluttering time! Struggling still? Read this amazing piece about what questions (Besides “Does it spark joy”) to ask yourself. I think you can use this in all aspects of your life, NOT just material possessions!

What an inspiring MORNING routine. Personally, I don’t find affirmations very helpful for myself, but I do love the other ideas, most of which I already do. Love the concept of breaking this into three areas: Mind, Body, Spirit. What a great way to start your day but focusing a bit on each area!  Something I find VERY helpful is doing a “BRAIN DUMP” first thing in the morning. Just write anything and everything in my mind. To do lists, thoughts, ideas, feelings, emotions. 

The Case for Curiosity: We should never stop being curious. Stepping OUT of my routine is such a struggle and so hard for me, but we learn and grow from those hard moments and experiences.  I am going to continue to strive to be more present WHEREVER I am and WHATEVER it is that I am doing. Whether in a yoga class (feel my body, emotions, feelings) Talking with someone (Am I really listening, or am I trying to “fix”)  At a museum (Am I there just to check it off my “to do list” or am I looking at and feeling what the artists are trying to portray? How does it make me feel?)  These are just a few examples of HOW I plan to be a bit more curious. As I tell my students, ASK those questions!  Keep asking, get clarity, truly understand it (Does not mean you need to agree with it!)

Watching

Relationships around me. It is interesting to sit back and observe

People’s reactions IF I hung this in my bathroom (Don’t worry I don’t plan on it, as of right now)

Want to watch:  The new Brene Brown talk on Netflix and “Mine” , which was recommended by a friend, that I still have not gotten around to.

Grateful

Boundaries Arent A Bad Idea Beautifully written/drawn and said, friendships and boundaries. So true, we (I) grew up in an age where movies like “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun”, “Stand By Me”, etc were prevalent That is the vision and idea of friendship I had and strived for, yet never attained or achieved it.

Hobbies & Activities:  I do many “activities” (walking hiking reading yoga) and I am so grateful for those things. But do I have a hobby? Writing? yes. I want another one though.Image result for hobbies

Values:  12 of the Most Important Values in Life to Live By  Which of these are easy for you? Which are the most difficult?  These are difficult to read and really dive into and self assess yourself.

Sharing

Updates on The Ordinary products – I ordered four products from The Ordinary. I have been using these items for two weeks so far, here are my thoughts and updates:

  1.  The Ordinary
    Glycolic Acid 7% Toning Solution – 240ml

    Not sure how I feel about this honestly? It is a toner. I was previously using witch hazel. I do not see much of a difference nor do I really see WHAT is is actually doing for me? I do like the slight tingle factor (which witch hazel did not have)  I’ll continue for a few more weeks and see if my thoughts change?

  2. The Ordinary
    Niacinamide 10% + Zinc 1% – 30ml:  This by far has been my favorite!  I just started alternating with this because you should not use this along with Vitamin C. I notice this dries up and clears up any imperfections. Excited to see how I like this after a few more weeks!
  3.  The Ordinary
    100% Cold-Pressed Virgin Marula Oil – 30ml:  I really want to love this, but honestly I am a bit scared of it because of its heaviness and likelihood to clog up more pores. I have been using it on my chest, elbows, hands, and any other dry spots. I find it leaves me VERY shiny when I use it on my face. Maybe I will try incorporating it during my PM routine. I prefer my rosehip oil (from Trilogy)
  4. The Ordinary
    Lactic Acid 10% + HA 2% – 30ml:  This is a water-based solution. I use it in the AM. Honestly, I see/feel nothing as a result. I am not really sure WHAT it should be doing. Not sure I will reorder this.
  5.  The Ordinary
    Granactive Retinoid 2% Emulsion (Previously Advanced Retinoid 2%) – 30ml:  Prior to this, I was using the Good Genes by Sunday Riley as my retinol. However, the price of Good Genes is quite steep.  So I thought I would give this retinol a try.  I think I may have experienced a bit of my skin detoxing as I noticed some slight breakouts, however, I am not certain it is from this retinol or the change of weather, where I am at in my cycle (hormones) etc. I had mixed feelings about Good Genes as well but from comparison so far, I feel like Good Genes felt better, but even with Good Genes, was not really sure WHAT it was doing or supposed to be doing

 

 

Questions

  1.  Are you highly sensitive? How do you deal with it?
  2. Do you have a hobby? What is it?
  3. Which value is most important to you?
Healthy Lifestyle

“Just let me be myself

That’s all I ask of you”

Image result for dont tell me what to do dont tell me what to say

Thinking…..

  • Shame and guilt consume my days and I am working towards making it less so. The way that helps me is saying things out loud to the world that gives me shame/guilt. Sure no one else may care, but it is what I need right now at this point. Usually, when I feel that first ounce of discomfort or pain, I push it away with busy-ness. Yesterday that ugly feeling overcame me, and I let it. I acknowledged it as just a feeling and was able to move on. The first time it popped up was while I was at yoga. During classes, the teachers will go around to students and offer assists. I LOVE getting assists and being touched (shame). It feels excellent and makes me feel that someone CARES about me. I have difficulty with allowing people to touch me and this has been a huge step for me, yet I feel shame. I feel bad that I enjoy it. It makes me feel icky and wrong but it is not. Image result for yoga assists    I am allowed to experience joy, we all are. After that, the next time guilt/shame reared its ugly head was my decision to clean and plant flowers on my balcony ALONE. Initially, I asked my father for help, not because I NEEDED help but because I wanted HIM to feel needed. Yet, it was a beautiful day, I was not feeling rushed, I wanted to continue this pattern without breaking the cycle. My father is very stubborn (like me) and I knew if he was involved he would try to do things his way, which would leave to either an argument or me keeping quiet. I decided to do it on my own and continue to enjoy my calm and slower pace. I immediately felt shame. I acknowledged it and moved on. There were many other moments throughout the day but I continued to acknowledge and move on. One day at a time……
  • I need to practice being more optimistic (read more HERE). I am tired of the permanent scowl on my face. It hurts. This article is a great reminder of the messages all around us! Interesting article and something to experiment with! What’s Your Optimism Ratio?
    IMG_6453                                                      This is a more accurate representation of how I typically feel. Thinking. Wondering, Planning. Tuning out the things around me. The smiles? They are for pictures.  Not an accurate representation (not saying I am miserable and depressed, this is just ME)
  • Being Overambitious is Making You Less Fun to Be Around

    Quoted from the article:

    • Overambition is the Thief of the Love For The Moment and Life Itself

      Definition of Overambition: a state of self-induced attachment to an aim that serves to turn the present moment into nothing more than a cheap stepping stone.

      Definition of Healthy Ambition: Approaching life with intentions that elevate both your present and future.

Dream Life…..

  • I need new sneakers. Mine have a hole in the toe….. I am eyeing these (sustainable!) sneaks, can’t decide on the color, “Glacier” or “Butter” (leaning towards Glacier)Image result for everlane the trainer glacier
  • If I ever visit Idaho, I really want to stay in a ………potato. Yes, that is correct, Big Idaho hotel air bnb 

 

Reading…..

April 27 is National Independent Book Store DayImage result for national independent bookstore day 2019

I mostly borrow my books from the library, BUT if you are thinking of purchasing a new treasure, make sure to support a local book store (Love Inkwood in Haddonfield, NJ)

What I read:

One of Us is Lying – Grade:  D +

This expresses how I felt while reading

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If you like/love YA (Young Adult Fiction) You will probably enjoy this. I just ….DON’T. I need to accept it and STOP reading YA!

And this is how I felt when I finished the book…

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All The Ugly and Wonderful Things –  Grade: B+

Dark. Sad. Depressing, crazy.  Such a great book!  Trigger warning, this may be difficult for those that have dealt with abuse in any form. Read with an open mind. This would make an EXCELLENT book club discussion!

November 9 by Colleen Hoover :  Grade:  A 

I can’t say enough about Colleen Hoover. Her books surprise me every single time! They are so different!  I loved this story about acceptance and love with an unusual and unforseen plot twist!

What I am Reading Now:

Jar of Hearts

The Girl He Used To Know (have to wait for the copy to become available again as I did not finish it in time)

Watching…..

  • Out for depression. In myself AND others.  I have struggled with depression my entire life. It is SO exhausting and tiring. I am tired of it. I feel like I am on a roller coaster, ups and down. I am sure I am not much different from you or anyone else. We all experience these feelings and emotions. This is a great article, PLEASE read it if you or someone you know is experiencing depression
  • How society is now manipulating us by easing away from the word “Diet” BUT disguising it as “wellness” or “Self-care”. NOPE, not going to buy into it. A FASCINATING read and can relate on SO MANY levels!

According to Christy Harrison, a registered dietician and host of the popular podcast Food Psych, “Diet culture is a system of beliefs that,” among other aims, “worships thinness and equates it to health and moral virtue,” “promotes weight loss as a means of attaining higher status,” and “demonizes certain ways of eating while elevating others.”

There is not a day that goes by without mention to the “Obesity epidemic” or how “Americans continue to get fatter”, yet the problem with these reports is that it fails to portray any sort of reason or balance. Who said FAT is bad? Fat has nothing to do with your health.  That is a proven fact. Losing weight and “thinness” does NOT equal health. What is being forgotten is that emotional health is a HUGE factor.

Take a few minutes. READ THIS . Ask yourself…….I constantly question myself with these

Are my choices around food guided by rules that aren’t medically necessary? Could I instead explore what it means to listen to and heed my body’s desires? Is my fitness practice transactional—one in which I exercise so that I’m allowed food? What might it look like to engage in movement from a place of excitement, rather than penance? What are my motivations for how I eat and exercise? Do these routines make me happy in and of themselves, or do I see them as a means to an end? We’re taught to do so many things for the end result. But what if we just did something—ate a cupcake when we craved one, took a passive instead of a strenuous yoga class—because it brought us joy?

Grateful For…..

Time off. I loved having off this week for Spring Break. It was a mix of productivity, time spent with my parents and lots of thinking, reading, and yoga’ing ❤  I thought I would feel less “introverted” but I do not. I definitely love my quiet time! Finally some peace! Trying to soak it up as much as I can before walking back into the chaos!  3 causes of Introvert Burnout

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From Monday’s excursion to the Mutter Museum #coffeechalk’sDAD. My favorite  STILL is the wall of skulls (description of the person and cause/way of death is included)Image result for mutter museum wall of skullsimg_0427

Spotted during my walk, full bloom!

 

Inspired By…..

The men I have dated and the relationships I have had

I am so grateful for all the experiences I have had. I have been married and dated throughout my 38 years. Each person and experience was a lesson, bringing me to where I am at today. I have recently actively stopped dating and looking I have been taking time to explore myself as well as the many lessons I have learned over the years. I am finally seeing what has been holding me back. Acceptance Of myself. All of my romantic relationships have had one thing in common. I was not genuine or true to myself.
I have settled for things and turned the eye on things that were deep values for me.
I have said yes to many things I did not want to do
I have agreed to things I did not find agreement with
I have not texted or called for fear of seeming needy
I have spent time trying to pick the perfect restaurant or place for the other person. Not me
I pretended I enjoyed sports. Late nights and sex more times that I’d like to admit
I did not speak up when I should have for fear of seeming “difficult”
I let things continue and go on longer than I should have, trying to convince myself there was something wrong with me for not liking this “perfect person”
I have felt fat, ugly and undesirable and kept it to myself
I held back anything that made me seem selfish
I did not speak up when something did not feel good or right                                                    I have minimized myself and accomplishments in order to not hurt the other
I have hidden the things I love to eat in fear of being judged as overindulgent or weird
I have worn things based on what I think they would like
I have shaven my legs when I didn’t feel like it
I have spent money on things I would not normally spend on
I have said sorry for things I was not certain I should even be sorry for
I have changed my mind but kept quiet for fear of being called unreliable or wishy-washy

I slowly acknowledge these things and am practicing being true and genuine to myself and others around. Even if it means walking away or being walked away from

I will not be quieted or do anything that does not feel good to me or my body and that is the one thing I can be certain about that feels good . You don’t own me…..

I am so thankful for my past, BUT I choose NOT to carry it forever (read this here)

  • Creatives CHECK THIS OUT!  I am a “maker” (I am determined and will get things done. I struggle to listen to my intuition and experience joy. YUP)                                This was so much fun (and visually appealing) to do!

Sharing…..

Image result for not sharing

This is a new section. This is SO hard for me. I hate, hate, HATE, sharing things I love, use, etc. I think deep down I feel it will take something away from me, my uniqueness. Yet I constantly remind myself, there is enough uniqueness in the world that I can and WILL still be me (reality check!).  If someone else can experience the joy I do, why not share it!

  • The comfiest sports bra I am currently loving, it is from Target (not sustainable 😦 )  But it is priced right at $16.99. It is seamless and oh so comfy!  It offers just the right support and coverage too!
  • The Ordinary skin care products! I recently purchased a bunch of items from The Ordinary, which is a lovely skincare company, that is priced Right!  Stayed tuned for my reviews. So far, I am in LOVE with Marula Oil!!! I am hoping it works well for me because I love the glowy hydration, but this has me concerned ….

    Organic Marula oil has been used by North African Ovambo women for centuries as their secret “elixir of youth” skin care weapon. The oil is derived from the nut of the South African marula fruit (said to contain over four times the amount of Vitamin C as an orange) and offers benefits to just about every skin type. High in oleic acid, organic marula oil is easily absorbed by dry skin and provides hydration throughout the day by preventing water loss without leaving an oily residue. The Vitamin E, phytosterols, amino acids, and the powerful antioxidants found in organic marula oil create a potent anti-aging elixir which boosts collagen production and fights free radicals. Because of Marula oil’s high Vitamin C content, continuous use has been shown to significantly improve skin elasticity and (with the aid of monounsaturated fatty acids) even reduce the appearance of cellulite. Marula oil has a comedogenic rating of 3-4, which gives it a high likelihood of clogging pores. If your skin tolerates coconut oil well, then you should have no problem using organic marula oil. Otherwise, try using marula oil as a light night mask or spot treatment at first to see how your skin reacts.  Pure organic marula oil is rare and can be quite expensive

 

YOUR TURN

  1.  Have you signed up below to follow coffeechalkblog? If not WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR, do it, for your chance to win a copy of “The Idea of You”
  2. What is something you feel shame about?
  3. Are you satisfied with your own “wellness” outlook and thoughts?
Healthy Lifestyle

Sympathy vs. Empathy

Book Giveaway!  See details here, or just scroll to the bottom of this post and sign up for email notifications!  Good luck!

Thinking

  • Upset with myself, for once again buying “Crap ” for the kids for Easter. Ugh. I just don’t like following and caving to consumerism, yet I still see and realize how difficult it is for others to do and follow this. I understand.  I do not have children, so it is much easier for me to follow this, it must be so hard to try to practice this when you have children that are influenced by other children classmates friends, etc. Start small be an example!Image result for easter basket

I should have done this………..maybe next yearImage result for bookworm easter basket

  • I am ANGRY. As adults, we have so many titles and duties. We have to be near perfect because of course, we are shaping our future, children. We have many duties, responsibilities and now I am going to add one more thing to your list, BUT I feel it is very important. Be careful about the messages you send. What works for you, may be completely absorbed differently by another. My anger at the moment, is, of course, diet/fitness related. Please be mindful NOT to say things and stereotype foods as “good and bad”, “Healthy or unhealthy”. Not only in front of children, but in general. Food is NOT the issue. It is our thoughts around it. We grow up believing a variety of things because of the atmosphere we are in. We have been instilled with thoughts and beliefs (many untrue) that we keep moving and pushing forwards. everyone struggles with food, diet, and exercise at some point in their life. We need to work on obtaining and maintaining healthy thoughts about food. Food is fuel, it is pleasure, it is wonderful. Nothing should be off-limits (unless you truly have an allergy/aversion/true dislike ) Can we focus on sending that message instead of “Don’t eat that it is BAD for you”. “I ran 4 miles today, it is OK for me to eat that ice cream”. JUST STOP. Think about what you are saying and doing. Is it working? Nope, disordered eating is at its highest. Just please be mindful, because it is alarming what I hear people saying and doing . (Off my pedestal, carry on)
  • How to change the way you feel, without actually changing anything. Great read and reminder!
  • Sympathy vs. Empathy. Woah. This is so good, I actually tried it yesterday, with a child and it was incredibly productive. This is going to be my challenge or the week, not only with children but EVERYONE. Everyone deserves to be heard, not fixed.

Inspired By

  • Reminding myself I am who I am, stop trying to change that.
  • edging myself closer to a social media break. I am so tired of the constant, never-ending posts of accomplishments, successes, etc. Then the opposite of sharing too much in the heat of it and in the moment. I feel like it is being forced upon us from all directions. Not to blame or shame anyone. I am not angry or blaming or calling anyone out on this. It just is a fact, we all do it (So do I!) I am just tired of it
    I miss the times where things were not so easy. As amazing as technology and social media are, it is only going to continue to evolve. Every day I feel like there is something new to try. I don’t fault us, I fault the creators who are trying to profit off of all this. Yet I can’t control this, them or you. I can only control myself.
    Every day I read about a new app or site that is being introduced to help us. Whether it is convenience, entertainment or information. It is exhausting. It creates FOMO (Fear of missing out) I mindfully choose not to participate because I know how easy it is to conform and get sucked into yet another habit that I don’t really want or need.
    I personally, find my introverted self, wanting more and more to pull away from people. I don’t know whether its the overload and frustration of all the social media, societies constant messages to make ourselves BETTER, or the emotional drain I put upon myself. I am feeling it though. I want less and less to spend time with others, which is draining, and more and more time to myself. I should rephrase, I want to spend time with people, just not those that are draining (I guess we all feel this way)Reading a book, writing, being outside. Those things feel GOOD to me. Those other things…… feel confining.
  • Not being good, great or excellent at something really………SUCKS. Loved this article , how to find JOY at things that you are not currently amazing at (yet or ever)

Reading

Need help figuring out WHAT to read next?  Fill out this form and let me help you pick your next read!

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November 9 by Colleen Hoover – 4 stars.

I love Colleen Hoover, her writing and books really draw me in, and keep my attention quite well (Ohhh is that a bird??)  I liked this story and then at the end I LOVED It.  It’s about a young girl that gets scarred from a fire, although grateful to be alive, she feels ashamed and not beautiful. Her dreams of becoming an actress quickly fade, no help to her discouraging/practical? father. She meets someone who truly accepts and loves her and as they are both still so young when they meet (18) they devise a plan to meet up every year ONE day (November 9) to pick up where they left off until they both turn 23. THen they can decide what to do Many ups and downs, heartbreak, laughter, love throughout. Reading this, felt a bit unrealistic at times. I do wish the main characters were a bit older to start with because they are both very mature for 18…. honestly I struggle to meet people in their 40’s and 50s with that maturity and understanding. However, the story unfolds and it makes a lot more sense. Great quick read! I enjoyed it!

All the Ugly and Wonderful Things 

a friend LOVED this book so much, that she has inspired me to read it (or re-read it)  Excited to get through it so we can chat more about it, and our love of psychological thrillers!

One of Us is Lying

hoping I love this one and it is a quick read!

The Girl He Used to Know

 I am hoping to love this as much as some of the reviews, I am only a few chapters in, and it’s good, but it’s not one I “Can’t wait to get back to reading”.  I hope it picks up for me soon!

Watching

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You want ME to watch T.V.??

I am struggling to get myself to watch something on television!  This week I am on Spring Break, and a friend recommended the movie “Mine” on Netflix. I am hoping that his encouragement and the fact that we can have a discussion about it after I watch, will be enough to get me through it!  I’d rather go to the dentist than watch T.V. (ok, so my dentist is pretty awesome, but STILL) My parents watched this recently and gave it a thumbs up and said I should watch it as well!

Also, my French pen pal suggested a Comedian on Netflix, Gad Elmaleh in American Dream, for me to check out.  LOOKS like I have my homework cut out for me this week! WISH ME LUCK!

Wanting/Intentions

  • to detail my car – so many early morning coffee spills that need attention!
  • New spring sheets. These are beautiful
  • On a mission to find some ARTWORK that I truly love (and can afford)
  • Bike ride at the beach
  • Mutter Museum trip
  • Get plants for my patio planter
  • Spa day with mom (self-made)
  • massage
  • Read at a cafe/coffee shop
  • Spring Clean my home 
  • Continue writing my snail mail letters

 

Dream Life

Grateful For

My family and friends.

I had the BEST Easter and holiday weekend! It consisted of friend time and family time. More and more the two feel to be crossing paths and becoming the same “feel”

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Photo credit to my cousin, Mike, Wow, way to capture the moment!