Thankful Thursday

Thursday! “Its like the NEW Friday”  🙂  Seriously. Can NOT get better than this.  It is my last day of work for the week and I am headed to the beach to relax for my birthday…….because that is what I want to do! 🙂

So I am thinking how lucky I really am. I am thankful for so much in my life right now and I want the world to know!  So what am I thankful for?

 

1.  Friendships

Seriously. I have the BEST friends ever. They accept me for me, my flaws, my imperfections, my quirks.  I have never really had true friendships, I realize how rare and how important it is to surround yourself with people that make YOU feel good (and you make them feel good in turn)

This morning I woke up, grabbed Lily and headed out the door for a walk and wawa run (French Vanilla coffee addiction)  When I opened the door, i was SHOCKED.  I almost started to cry.  My BFF, Beata, left me a special surprise. It really made me feel so special and loved (Lily really liked the balloon)  I have no clue WHEN she snuck this on my doorstep, but it was a wonderful surprise.  I am THANKFUL for her, our long talks, how she respects me, how we can be honest with each other and most of all how we are always there for each other when someone needs it. She encourages me to face me fears…….whether she knows it or not.

A few months ago, a dear friend gave me a special surprise. We call it my “free bird” necklace.  I do not think she really knows how much it means to me.  I wear it EVERY day.  It has been a reminder that I am free, and I am the only one that can “free” myself.  Free of my eating disorder, free of my negative relationships, free of my negative self talk….Free.  Ana, you are an amazing woman, mother,doctor and friend.  I do not know how you manage to do it, you are so put together and still manage to find time to make me feel special.  Not only is she an amazing friend, she is the BEST podiatrist I have ever met. She is so caring and thorough, something that is not easy to find.  If you have ANY foot issues, PLEASE see her Best Podiatrist!  She respects me and my values, and thinks of me often.  I love the way she makes me feel.

I have the BEST friends and family, please do not be offended if I did not name you 🙂  Everyone deserves to shine, it does not mean I do not love you and think you are an amazing friend, it just means I do not have the time to list everyone right now  (I am being honest)  I try my best not to get my feelings hurt by others actions (or inactions) I tell myself there is a reason and purpose for everything

2.  Peanut Butter

How did I NOT eat Peanut Butter for so long?  It is my new favorite thing and I am so thankful for it!!!   I could eat it ALL the time.  It is definitely becoming an obsession, but a good one (for once!!)  I can not decide what MY favorite way to eat it is……in oatmeal, with banana on a sandwich, with a SPOON?  All the ways :)~

 

 

3.  Happiness

I am thankful that I am finally able to love myself and give myself the best gift of all……..happiness. Sure I still have tough days (and always will) but for the most part I am loving myself, my body and my life.  I have realized that I am in control of this.  This is something MUCH better to be in control of.

 

Some things that are making me HAPPY that I’d like to share with you 🙂

How to be a true friend

50 habits for a HAPPY life!

27 iice cream shops I NEED to visit

Are you low maintence?  Yup yup I def. fit these

I will keep this in mind on my next date 

speaking of dates  lol

Perfect eggs

French women do it right 🙂

Different types of yoga

Trying to save money?

 

4.  I would like to end on this final note.  Something that I am extremely excited, nervous, scared, happy, for………..eating a special birthday treat tonight. It has been YEARS since I have allowed myself something so good.  I am trying to decide what to go with, or what THINGS to go with. Dessert..…I am worth it.  I can and will eat whatever I want and whatever makes me feel good.

Happy Birthday to me ❤

 

Your turn

1.  Do you have a best friend?

2.  Finish this sentence

“I always _________________, Sometimes I ________________, I never tried ____________”

3.  Do you have any birthday traditions?

 

Tuesday Thoughts

Tuesday Thoughts

 

Life – what I am thinking about……….

 

• Yesterday I had a doctors appointment, in which I had to get weighed…………Guess what? I could CARE less! ! ❤ what an awesome feeling!  FEELING STRONG

• I am pretty much thinking I have officially “lost it”.  I took Lily (the pup) out again for a bike ride.  I didn’t anticipate the ride being so far and tiring  LOL  I learned my lesson.  I got some odd looks (especially by police officers) But I DON’T CARE, I love it, Lily loves it, if you think I am a dork, so be it!!

• 

  The above fact may or may NOT be the reason I get a second date. I am leaning towards NO second date…..after I told him one of my hobbies was “Riding my bike with my dog”….His loss!

• I want my life to be clutter free. Therefore I want my house AND classroom to be clutter free.  Each day I plan on trashing/donating one thing I have not used in over a few months.  Even if it is hard….
• 
• Two days until my birthday getaway!! Weeeee , so excited!! I need to pack, plan and go!

 

• What I should get for my birthday dessert? Cake, cupcake, cheesecake, ice cream cake? Decisions decisions!! So excited!

 

• PLEASE check out my cousins NEW business!  https://www.facebook.com/pages/Kona-Ice-of-Cherry-Hill/705523459484958  Seriously, WHAT better way to cool off this summer? Orrrrr for a fundraiser, event, or to just see them in your area!!  What is YOUR favorite Kona flavor??  I am still deciding!

 

Love– I have decided. I will NOT settle until I can find someone that loves me like my mother does.  Talk about true love. That woman is selfless. She has taught me so much. I will never settle for anything less

 Few great reads:

 

The guy you date vs. the guy you Marry 

http://thoughtcatalog.com/nancy-yan/2014/07/5-differences-between-the-guy-you-date-and-the-guy-you-marry/

best friends

http://thoughtcatalog.com/ella-ceron/2014/07/18-things-only-your-best-friend-can-get-away-with-that-are-annoying-if-anyone-else-does-them/

Simple Berry Compote (Waffle/Pancake Brunch Party, what an awesome idea!)

 

http://www.bloglovin.com/frame?post=3195706491&group=0&frame_type=a&blog=3831052&frame=1&click=0&user=0

 

 

YOUR TURN!!!

1.  what one thing can you get rid of today that you can either donate or trash?

2.  reading tips? I seriously can NOT sit down and read.  I am ok with informative reads (like self help,e tc) but can NOT read a book for pleasure!  What are you currently reading? Any tips ?  Did you always enjoy reading?

3.  What is your favorite dessert?

“Un”-Manic Monday

“Un”-Manic Monday.

“Un”-Manic Monday

“Just another manic Monday…..wish it were….”

Enough! Why can’t Monday be just as great as Sunday (or Saturday) for that matter?!

It definitely can be. YOU are the only one that can make that possible. My goal is to love every day. I plan on doing that by making sure I plan or do some exciting things during the week.

Some weekend highlights for me:

1. Tow path bike ride along the canal in New Hope/Lambertville. (With Lily!)

2. Crabbing with mom and dad (great work dad! Mom and I sat in the car and read the paper. Brrrrr too cold and rainy for us! (Lucky crabs) I JUST bought old bay seasoning over the weekend for a recipe I had….was happy to share it with mom. Huge tin of it!

3. Coffee date:). Yup. It was good!! ( the date AND coffee!!)

4. Cooking! I made some delicious things with jersey fresh tomatoes!

5. Caught up on my blogs! Here are a few of my favorite reads!
do runners really need a walk break?

The 20 healthiest foods

10 things happy people never do

Best books for introverts

more books

could you use a technology break?

beautiful

reminds me of my perfect or picky post

Your turn

1. What is one weekend highlight you have?

2. How will you make Monday just as good as Sunday?

Tow path biking

So my bike basket for Lily arrived! I could not wait to hit the road! So after the rain yesterday I grabbed lily, the bike and the basket and headed to Lambertville/new hope! Wow. What a gorgeous ride!

I had some trouble getting the basket on the bike. It kept hitting my tire. I wanted to cry. After an our of sweating and struggling a very nice couple saw me and jumped right in to help! It was so nice! It really made me feel good! There really are some good people out there! Makes me believe. Also makes me realize that I need to be more aware of people around me and help when I can. Karma.

After some thinking, tweaking And strapping we were on our way …..finally!

Lily absolutely loved it! I am so happy she enjoys it! She loved seeing all the animals and of course all the attention, which she gets a lot of.

The homes and flowers along the canal are just breath taking!

I will definitely be back. It is gorgeous. I wanted to take lily to an outdoor restaurant for dinner….but a Saturday night in new hope….just was not happening.

I got home after 10! Lily and I were both starving! Luckily whole foods was still open and the accommodated me! Woooohoo (finished up my pad Thai with chicken from whole foods )

The employees at whole foods are amazing! Love them!!

Although the day did not go quite as planned it was fabulous . Serene. Relaxing. No agenda. No anxiety. Just me and the canal (and lily)

Where is your favorite place to bike ride??

Perfectly Picky

Am I picky? Or am I striving for perfectionism? I feel one is healthy and the other not so much. I think I have always strived for perfectionism and I believe that is where a lot of my problems start.

I want to be the perfect friend, perfect daughter, perfect teacher, perfect person, eat the perfect foods and make the perfect choices all the time . PERFECT PERFECT PERFECT

I have learned the hard way that perfectionism is not a great thing. What is perfect for me may not be perfect for you and that is okay. Instead of being perfect I choose to be picky now

So what am I picky about?
I choose to be picky about tomatoes. I want a perfect tomato for my sandwich if I am going to have one, mediocre is not okay. It does not have to look perfect but it needs to be perfectly right

I choose to be picky about my apples. I like them to be the right size and without bruises

I choose to be picky about my friends. I realize we cannot all be alike and I choose to be picky about what I can accept and what I cannot

I choose to be picky about the food I feed my dog. I do not need to explain my reasons or justify I just need you to accept it and follow my wishes

I choose to be picky about the way I run my classroom. I really do love what I do and my goal is to make the best of it for myself and my students. I choose to teach real life skills that will benefit my students in the long run

I finally choose to be picky about men I date. I choose to be picky about demanding respect, loyalty, trust, and communication.

I choose to be picky about shampoo. I like to take care of my hair it makes me feel good about myself

I choose to be picky about demanding my quiet time. I need it more than others do maybe or maybe not

I choose to be picky about the food I put in my body. A recent scare has made me realize the importance of eating well. I choose to put whole foods ,good foods ,full fat foods in my body because my body needs it.

I choose to be picky about my time. I like to allocate my time for different things that is what makes me feel best

I choose to be picky about flowers. I like flowers that make me feel good and happy and I think are pretty for my tables

Instead of being perfectly fine with myself ,all these years I’ve been trying to be perfect for everyone else.
Lily, just like me, may not have the perfect body, perfect hair, perfect personality, perfect manners, etc. but she is perfect for me. Just like I am perfect for me, you are perfect for you.

You may think I choose to be picky about silly things or you may agree with some, all or most of my choices. It’s okay. I choose to be picky about the way I let things affect me . You can tell me the truth and hurt my feelings and I will get over it and I choose to do the same for you

Being picky is perfectly okay.

Your turn

What is one food you are very picky about?

What is the quality of a friend you are picky about?

What do you wish you were “pickier” about?

 

Friday Faves!

*This image is from http://www.sincerely-sara.com/2012/12/friday-faves-from-around-web.html and not my own

Some of my favorite posts from the week 🙂

I really LOVE that my mom really valued eating dinners together nightly.  I am hoping to continue the tradition one day.

What are you avoiding in your life?  (I am really trying NOT to do this anymore. I really like this article!!)

I really want this candle but can not bring myself to paying the hefty price tag 🙂

S’mores milkshake.  ’nuff said

13 signs you need to do more work  – I am gladly say I am at a much better place right now than I was this time last year. THAT alone makes me proud!

Some things to do with your jersey tomatoes:

Rustic Tomato Sauce

Pico De Galo

Baked Egg nests

Israeli salad

Tomato Frittata

Hearty Bolognese

If I can ever bring myself to begin reading …..Books ALL introverts should read!!
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/07/23/introverts-books_n_5593122.html?ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000043&ir=Science

 

YOUR turn!

1. What is your favorite way to eat tomatoes?

2.  What is your favorite (NJ) beach??

3.  What is one task/thing you are avoiding this week?

 

For a good cause

Wow. That’s all I have to say.

TopSoccer did it again! Last night I had the opportunity to attend the annual fundraiser dinner, social and raffle at Marco’s of Evesham twp for the amazing program TopSoccer that has brought sooooo much to all my students.

My two lovely dates (mom and B) accompanied me for a night of fun, food, dancing and hope. Of course we had HOPED to win one of nearly 70 locally sponsored gift baskets BUT the bigger prize was that wonderful people, good hearts and opportunity still exist

TopSoccer is a

US Youth Soccer TOPSoccer (The Outreach Program for Soccer) is a community-based training and team placement program for young athletes with disabilities, organized by youth soccer association volunteers. The program is designed to bring the opportunity of learning and playing soccer to any boy or girl, who has a mental or physical disability. Our goal is to enable the thousands of young athletes with disabilities to become valued and successful members of the US Youth Soccer family.

So what makes them so great? Well there are far to many to even name. So instead I will share some (blurred for privacy ) photos of their SECOND trip to our school to do a soccer camp for our ESY program. The children has the best day on their lives , as many quoted. They learned so much and most of all learned that they can do anything too…….. They can and they will!!

Perfect evening :).

Thankful Thursday

Ahhhhh. Thursday. Finally. All week I tend to look forward to the weekend and sort of dread my week. I’ve decided to stop that. I am the only one that can Change it. Why can’t I enjoy mon-thurs. Just as much as Friday or Saturday???? I can. I am the only one that can make that happen.

So. I am thankful it is Thursday , but I am also grateful and thankful for……

1. My job /career. Yes there are days it’s stressful and challenging, but yhT makes the special moments even better. I meet wonderful students that teach me something everyday

2. My pup. She is my baby. She makes me smile (and crazy). I am really excited to try out her new bike seat this weekend!!!! Weeeeee

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3. Wholefoods. Yup. I love the location. Love their products and love trying new things.

4. My cousin. I feel like he really gets me. Maybe we get each other.

5. The 80 degree weather. Perfect for walks

6. Hummingbirds. I love watching these guys as I drink my coffee and read the paper each morning

7. Fridays OFF. I need a break from kids. All kids. All people, in fact

8. Oatmeal. Seriously. How did I ever enjoy breakfast without oats

9. Jersey fresh fruits and veggies. Mmmm nuff said

10. Coffee. No explanation needed

11. My car. I love it. I love keeping it clean. It makes me happy and feel good and safe.

12. To do lists. Good old fashioned pen and paper to do lists. This helped me stay focused and anxiety free this morning. Nothing better than crossing things off!!

13. Long talks with my mom. Instantly feel better

14. Journaling.

15. My godson and nephews. Seeing their innocence makes me smile…..and remember the ease of being a kiddo.

16. The 24 oz coffee. Yup. Just right.

17. My new veggie spiraler that came today. Woooooo finally

18. My health. I will continue to take of myself the best I can

19. My student L, running and idling and PLAYING on the playground with a FRIEND. Made me smile on the inside and out. True genuine happiness with socializing.

20. Flowers. Fresh from moms garden.

What are you grateful for today?

No longer a runner

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4:30 am alarm goes off. I get up, grab lily, get my coffee, eat a bagel and…..run. Every day.

When I don’t run I feel cranky, tired, sad,lazy, like a failure, fat, ashamed,guilty. Running wakes me up,gives me a natural high, makes me happy, makes me healthy…..or so I kept telling myself. that is what I wanted to believe. In fact , for me, it was the exact opposite of all those things. Something healthy turned out to be a big trigger and unhealthy habit for me.

For years I forced myself to wake up early, eat a minimal breakfast and run run run. Every day.
I really did enjoy it at first. Then it became an obsession ” I didn’t run today so I should eat less, I should not feel hungry what is wrong with
Me I didn’t even run today! How can I be so lazy. Some people run ten miles a day”. The negative, abusive words kept coming. Guilt. For not running. Guilt for feeling hungry and wanting to eat. Guilt

Finally one day I saw how my “healthy” habit was destroying me. Why was it causing me all these guilty feelings? Why was I not loving myself and being good to my body by giving it rest and food and energy? I knew it had to stop. I also knew it was not going to be easy. I struggle every day. I fight with myself and go against what my brain is telling me to do( run more eat less , abuse myself and my body ). Something instilled in my brain for so many years. So many negative connotations about food. So many rules. So many ways to make me hate myself.

Stop. Get help.
How can you help? Stop associating Diana with running.

Stop this:
Diana = running
Diana = eating only “healthy” foods.

Diana = so much more

Diana = teacher, daughter , friend, good listener, animal lover,loves to travel, explore, read blogs, quiet walks with my dog, cooking, reading
Blogs, writing, painting, reading tj newspaper , massages And facials , quietness , Starbucks and coffee breaks, meditation, yoga

That is Diana. That is who I Am and so much more. I am learning new things about myself every days. Things and foods I love, how strong I am And how I do not need to be like anyone else.I am no longer Diana the runner. Maybe one day I will be again. Maybe I’ll go for a short run one morning……if I feel like it. Maybe ill just continue doing what I love, enjoy and feels right for ME. No one else. Just me.