Ups and Downs

Some days you’re up. You’re in tune with the universe, your life is flowing, and the present moment makes sense. And other days you’re down. You might be in an emotional funk—because you’re tired, you received bad news, or maybe you just can’t access your sense of purpose. It happens. But we are not our emotions…and as conscious humans, we actually have the power to manage them (and their fluctuations). We may forget this, but it’s true.

Life is a roller coaster. Some days we feel “Up” others we feel “Down”. How we handle it is key, and where I am looking for my own balance.

I have days where I feel GREAT! Others I feel sadder than pooh bear without any honey 😦

I want to be able to control these better, and make more UP days for myself. I know I can do it, just figuring out how to trick my mind into believing it

I am hoping the stress of my move, transition, life changes, have been factoring into the way I feel. I AM SCARED. I AM TIRED/EXHAUSTED. I get moments of panic that hit me “Oh my god, did I do the right thing?” Then I calm myself down and talk myself through “its ok, you NEED to try it, you need change, you need to find your happiness”

I have realized how much I have relied on others to make decisions and choices for me. THIS is exactly why I am so afraid. I am not trusting myself 100% yet.

Trust is something that is very difficult for me. I feel like I never really had it in relationships. Until recently. I have formed so many great bonds and actually trust and love the people I call my friends ❤  They have eased my anxiety and fear and made me realize that there really is GOOD in people.

So here I start anew. That trust is going to take time again, especially living in an area filled with vacationers that “run away” from their problems and come here. I am afraid of getting hurt, lied to, misled, but I can not control others and can only be cautious but remain open to benefit of the doubt.

I feel STUPID here. I don’t know the “ways”. I feel like an “outlander”. I feel like people KNOW I have no clue what I am doing…….but this is me, my own insecurity, and if they do, hey WHO CARES!! I need to stop being ashamed of not knowing things and continue to ASK questions even if I annoy people that think I am a fool…

I look forward to my friends visiting from back home. I can’t wait to show them new places and things I have explored and found 🙂

My Ups

I am excited to learn how the new school system works here (It is SOOOOO different!!!)

I am excited to see how I like my graduate classes

I am excited to see what is in my future 🙂

I am excited for visits from mom, wine and dining her, running around town.

I am excited for friends to come and catch up, explore and hit the beach (and maybe some golf balls!?)

Read more here 10 Tips To Manage Life’s Ups and Downs

Yesterday was not a very “Up” day for me. I am not proud. I tried to make it better and I had glimpses, but even looking at my pictures I see sadness, or maybe exhaustion? I need to be easier on myself 🙂

I added chair protectors to the legs of my chairs (Thanks Uncle Jim for the help and recommendation) I felt PROUD that I did it all by MYSELF. Sure, its not a big deal, but my hands very rarely touch a hammer. It feels so good to do things on your own FOR yourself 🙂

Then it was beach time

Then I realized I had a crap load of stuff to do and had to leave (its ok, I was getting restless sitting on the beach, I was tired, but restless, if that makes sense)

 

Crap! Gotta go home and watch pre-orientation videos for tomorrow about benefits! FUNNNNNNNNNNNNNN! haha

 

Your Turn

 

1. Do you experience ups and downs? Are they daily, weekly, non existent? How do yours manifest?

2.  Do you trust yourself , or do you find yourself relying on others for the answer?